Today I feel rather down, and my head is playing tricks on me. I felt extremely paranoid and angry this morning, there is no clear trigger…
So, I am reading and eating chocolate before school pick up to try and make myself feel better.
I love to read. I read a lot. At the moment I have a fiction, a nonfiction and an audiobook on the go, and sometimes I get confused! Ha.
I am also getting snuggles from our pup, and it does make me feel better. I guess Im still surprised by how quickly my mood can change, but I do feel better equipped to manage them, and not ‘act out’.
2pm… I can feel my anxiety rising, and anger is bubbling away under the surface. I am doing grounding and breathing exercises to try and stay focussed. I feel like I don’t know who I am today ,or who I’m even supposed to be. It’s such a huge change from yesterdays easy mood, BPD is so frustrating. I was feeling so secure and settled. I guess I should be pleased that it’ll likely be different again tomorrow!