My mental health is really suffering. I am angry, anxious, sad and lonely. Then as if by magic I feel nothing at all.
While walking Milo today, I sobbed and sobbed. I can’t carry on like this. I am exhausted with all the distress and stress in my head.
I have been referred to the Mental Health Team again, so now the waiting begins. I do everything I can to manage my symptoms, but I’m getting to the point of thinking it’s just all pointless. I see a life in front of me, that is sober and blessed, but mentally unstable and unwell. I feel that No amount of Mindfulness will fix me.
I am not depressed. I am in turmoil. I don’t want to die, I just want the pain to Stop.
I am continuing to use all the coping skills and knowledge I have, but it’s harder today. I am struggling to keep my head above water.