Here we are again. My eldest daughter is coming to ten years old next week. I feel gutted and ever so sad.
Obviously the people close to me, know that this is a massive trigger and upsetting time for me.
My daughter, Alice, lives with her father in Wales, as far as I know… I haven’t had contact for many years.
Every year it breaks my heart, every year the pain is deeper in my bones.
I feel so much guilt and anxiety over Alice, but, also now for Megan… She shouldn’t have to suffer for my past mistakes.
My life as a mother will never be the same, and it’s always hard for me, but I’m working hard to be a good and better parent.
One day, I wish that my two daughters, will know eachother, and grow to care for eachother. I pray that one day Alice will look for us, and want to know the truth.
I am always thinking of you, Alice Paul.. I love you, my first born girl.